January 7, 2010 - The Lady of Coins (Queen of Pentacles)

What do I need to know today about love for my happiness?

I love this card and always have. For an autumn baby with a passion for the twilight pleasures of the fall, what could be better than to be this queen, seated amid harvest glory? She possesses the qualities I wish I did, maybe I do -- nurturing, big-hearted, down-to-earth, resourceful, and trustworthy. She possesses a green thumb, has a way with children, and invites people into her happy home, offering food of course, or tea, anything needed for comfort. Why you could open your heart to her, probably will.

In the Jane Austen Tarot, the Queen of Pentacles (Lady of Coins) is represented by Elinor Dashwood, the oldest and sensible oldest daughter of the novel, Sense and Sensibility. I've been getting a lot of cards lately that deal with this novel. Might be time to re-read it again since this dichotomy, sense versus sensibility, has played a huge part in my life these last few years. I thought I was Elinor, found out I was Marianne, and perhaps now, I need to find my true inner Elinor if I don't want to lose by heart, my trust, my hope, my love.

The Lady of Coins can seem unfeeling. Certainly Elinor is judged so by her younger sister, Marianne. The Lady of Coins though possesses deep emotions, strong love, but is in control of them as opposed to allowing them to control her. She would never die of broken heart; she'd never make herself sick with grief. She may ache with her hurts but she lives her days and finds much to love about them. She cares for those around her and finds happiness in being of service to them. She's no milquetoast. She's no pushover. She possesses the great blessing of equanimity and perspective, of gratitude and finding and celebrating the good as opposed to the worst, the wrong, the hurt, the pain.

I have been struggling with how to keep my heart open without ripping it from my chest and handing to people, trusting they will honor and care for it. Why should they if I am so reckless with it? I can be big-hearted, even open-hearted, without giving myself away. I can be generous without being spendthrift with myself, as if I'm an unending well that can never be drained dry. All of us have limits. Many people drink from my well. A measured flow may be wise if I wish to be present for al of them.

"You too, as the Lady of coins, are likely an astute judge of character, because you observe an individual's actions, and are not misled or seduced by false words. Denial and delusion hold no appeal for you." Actions as the true measure of a heart. Of the all the lessons this last year, this is indeed the one I need to etch upon my very soul. Words are lovely, and when they're pretty I so want to believe them. Actions, however, are all we can measure ourselves and others against.

What Would Jane Do?

"Prudence and patience, combined with practicality, are not merely their own reward, but help one attain one's just desserts. The sound of a rattle signifies nothing, but the dulcet tones of measured harmony fall gently on every ear." p. 145

January 6, 2010 - The High Priestess

There was a time the High Priestess showed up in many of my readings. And then she didn't. I was of the world and in it. I was mother, student, employee, woman, writer. There wasn't time to do the work of this card. I was too busy with so many other things.

Even when school was done, when there was time and certainly reason to reflect, to look deeper, I didn't. Not sure why. Denial? Did I believe I had the gift of deep seeing and so didn't think there was anything more to see and learn than what I already knew? Who knows? There were certainly plenty of reasons to look deep. I had a good life but wasn't happy, still am less sanguine than I would like.

Joan Bunning writes in learntarot.com: "In readings, the High Priestess poses a challenge to you to go deeper - to look beyond the obvious, surface situation to what is hidden and obscure. She also asks you to recall the vastness of your potential and to remember the unlimited possibilities you hold within yourself. The High Priestess can represent a time of waiting and allowing. It is not always necessary to act to achieve your goals. Sometimes they can be realized through a stillness that gives desire a chance to flower within the fullness of time."

In the Jane Austen Tarot, the High Priestess is depicted by Jane Austen herself. She sits in a chair between two pillars, one black and one white, much as the High Priestess is situated in the Rider-Waite Tarot. In her hand, she holds her book Sense and Sensibility, traits which Austen possessed. Like the High Priestess, Jane understood duality and the need for wisdom and balance. Two of her books, Sense and Sensibility and Pride and Prejudice reflect just on this duality and the need to encompass the traits of the other.

Jane possessed wisdom beyond her years and an ability to gaze deeply into her culture and see what others could not. The High Priestess has this quality as well as an instinctive knowing about human dreams and foibles that serve her in good stead. This inner knowing is wiser and truer than any external commentary. This is my gift too. I am not missing my intuition as much as I am living it, we two so entwined there's no telling one from the other.

What Would Jane Do?

"Sit back and take in the whole situation as if from a great distance. Imagine you are not personally involved, so as to avoid emotional excess. What do you now see that you missed before? If you must choose now between action and inaction, do nothing. Events will play out in a way you have always known and understood on an internal level. Try and stay balanced, keep your own counsel, and, above all, your sense of humor." P. 16

January 5, 2010 - The Maiden of Teacups (Page of Cups)

Joan Bunning, of learntarot.com, writes: "The Page of Cups is Cupid bringing you opportunities for love. He delivers real chances to experience romance, deep feelings and the inner life - the wonders of the Cups suit. In readings, this Page suggest that an opening may appear that stirs your emotions, pulls at your heartstrings or brings you great joy. When you see such a chance, act on it!" So when this page comes up in a reading, he's telling you not just to act on opportunities, but to be -- be intuitive, be emotional, be intimate, be loving. Often we draw to us what we put out. By offering opportunities, opportunities are offered to us.

In the Jane Austen Tarot, the Page of Cups is called the Maiden of Teacups and is represented by Marianne Dashwood of the novel Sense and Sensibility. Marianne is Sensibility. She is passionate and emotional and sees with her heart not her mind, so she sees what she wants to see and not reality. Yes Willoughby has feelings for her. He may be just as passionate. He may even love her but he is not without sense. He knows the reality of his situation, a young man with a title but no money, who needs an heiress to allow him to keep his estates and to live in the manner to which he has grown accustomed. He may love Marianne but he won't marry her. He has not the courage to make himself but needs to marry his comfort and success.

When the Maiden of Teacups arises in a reading, she reminds you to look hard at the facts as opposed to the pretty fictions you prefer. An all or nothing approach is not always the best. Marianne experiences the heights of passion but Willoughby's rejection sends her into the depths of despair nearly killing her. At midlife I found myself the Maiden of Teacups. I knew great joy but also deep despair. And like Marianne I nearly killed myself (with a little help from genetics). This is a fine place for a young woman at the beginning of her life but not for someone firmly in the middle. Can sense and sensibility co-exist? Can there be passion tempered with clarity and discernment? Can we love deeply and well, knowing the good and the bad? It may be time to find out.

What Would Jane Do?

"Sensitivity without sense is as useless as sense without sensitivity, and far more preposterous. It is difficult to laugh at sense, but sensitivity without the balance of good judgement provides a veritable font for derision. Sensibility is an essential portion in the configuration of a lady, but discretion in application and public displays is necessary as well."

January 4, 2010 - Ace of Candlesticks (Wands)

I have always loved the Aces in the Tarot. There is such possibility in them, such promise. They are seeds but it doesn't always mean those seeds sprout, or if they do, when. They are a promise, nothing more, what could be if (and it's a big if) I nourish them. So today is the seed of creativity, the spark of a spiritual journey.

Here's what Joan Bunning says of the Ace of Wands:

"In readings, it shows that a seed of bold enthusiasm has been planted in your life although you may not yet recognize it. When the seed sprouts, it could take almost any form. It might be a creative idea, surge of optimism or need to act boldly. On the outside, it could be an offer, gift, opportunity, encounter or synchronistic event.

When you see this Ace, examine your life to see how its potent, confident energy could work for you. Be daring and brave. Sometimes you have to risk to get what you want. Look for the path that will excite you and push you beyond your limits. Seize the initiative, and let your enthusiasm take you to new heights. Wands are the suit of individual power and fulfillment. This Ace tells you that a time of passion is beginning. You will be able to assert your best for all to see."

In the Jane Austen Tarot, the suit of Wands is represented by Candlesticks and the story that most closely captures the essence of the suit is Pride and Prejudice. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett are the King and Queen of the suit as their journey is a spiritual one of growth, courage and change in order to find true happiness. The Ace of Candlesticks is a reminder of the light that shines brightly in all of us, the one we often hide under a bushel. It's a card about finding your true path and following it, risking much to gain so much more. This strikes home for I am not one that gives much thought to my light and these days I am not foundering as much as wondering what is my path, beyond job. Why am I here? Why did I stay?

What Would Jane Do?

"The road to any destination must begin with a first step. The key is to choose a destination that is truly representative of your core being. The quality of the journey will be in direct proportion to how well -- or ill -- it reflects your essential self." p. 57

January 3, 2010 - The Four of Quills (Swords)

I realize I have the Western habit of associating progress with forward motion, with doing, every time I draw a tarot card. If I can feel a forward movement, if there is something I can do or be, I get that. I feel it as progress. Surmount this, do that. Of course. Where do I go? What action do I take? What dragon do I slay? But what happens when I get a card that turns me toward the past? And what about a card that says, "take a break, rest. You don't always have to be doing to move along your path?"

The Four of Swords is a card of pausing, recuperating, contemplating, reviewing, and consolidating resources for the next phase. I recently read that what we have lost in our culture is the remembrance that progress is a cycle, that do is followed by reflection before we can do again. It's how our muscles work, a series of contractions and extensions, a dance of move and pause. We have lost the cycle of contemplation, always doing, moving. Yet without the reflection how do we know we are moving the right way, doing what we truly want. The Four of Swords is that reminder, that to everything there is a season, and this is the season of pause, reflect, prepare. In the Magician's wheel, the understanding of when to be silent is the last element, the North, and it is critical amid will and daring and knowing, to pause, to wait, to listen for an answer. If life is a conversation, and I believe it is, then I must allow life to take its turn. It will anyway. When I forget that is when I hurt myself.

In the Jane Austen Tarot, the Four of Quills is represented by Marianne Dashwood recovering from her broken heart and subsequent illness. Marianne loved intemperately and gave her heart completely to a man who, as much as he loved her, chose an heiress over love. Or maybe it's not about love versus not, but rather degrees of love, of good enough, of adding up the columns and deciding to lose a bit in heartfelt love for the increased security money brings. The key is not to judge. The key, at least what this card is telling me, is to avoid the intemperate, emotionalism of Marianne, the all or nothing, the sensibility and sensitivity without sense. I was Marianne. I was wild and intemperate. I courted illness. Having loved and lost I courted death, end, not specifically, but by breaking my heart as literally as it had been figuratively broken. No, to judge is to fall back into that despair, still more habit than not.

What Would Jane Do?

"One of the chief charms of youth is its idealism. However, one of the chief charms of youth is that it is a a period of short duration. Maturity calls for sense, as well as sensibility. Being carried away by passion can result in crises far more serious than the fortunate Marianne's. If your emotions are causing you more pain than pleasure, it may be time to reconsider your choices. Peace and serenity aid in making good decisions; chaos and torment invariably cause more of the same." P. 106

January 2, 2010 - The Three of Candlesticks (Wand)

This is the second time the Three of Candlesticks has come up this week. It is a message I apparently need to hear more than once. According to Joan Bunning, when the Three of Wands comes up in a reading the following areas are highlighted:

exploring the unknown

seeking out uncharted areas
going in quest of new adventure
expanding horizons
leaving the secure behind
tackling something different

having foresight

being visionary
looking for greater possibilities
planning ahead
knowing what to expect
getting a premonition
anticipating obstacles
taking the long view

demonstrating leadership

showing others the way
taking the main role
providing needed direction
rallying the group behind you
assuming a responsible position
setting an exampleserving as a representative

I'm not sure about the leadership part, but the rest is interesting, a message about intuition, vision, following that vision, taking the risk for adventure, not afraid.

Edward Ferrars, the Lord of Coins yesterday, may be indicative of a fear or conservatism that does not serve me, a clinging to the status quo because I'm too fearful to risk, to strike out on my own. It's hard not to see my mom's revelations this trip as a warning about settling.

Jane's Advice:

"A man without ambition is not likely to win admirers. Aspiration costs nothing and yet must be the core foundation of any successful endeavor. Without planning and consistent clever effort, however, the roots will twist and turn in on themselves, creating an in-dwelling of foul resentment and bitter dreams." P. 60

January 1, 2010 - The Knight of Coins (Pentacles)

The Knight of Pentacles is an interesting man. When he comes up in a reading, balance seems paramount for when you read his meanings there is the talk of one side and then the other, the positive and the negative. The Knight of Pentacles helps you remember that good qualities, taken to extremes become negatives. Knights bring in energies and it's up to you to determine whether that energy is helpful or hurtful.

In the Jane Austen Tarot, this knight is represented by Edward Ferrars, of Sense and Sensibility, the young man the elder Miss Dashwood has fallen in love with. He is the only knight in this deck who is not mounted on horseback. Instead he is depicted as a sober young man walking a dirt path to a cottage.

The Knight of Coins is someone who keeps his thoughts and feelings to himself. He means what he says and says what he means. He may be a man of few words but he makes those words count. He can be shy and self-effacing, almost too much so. He can doubt his self-worth, often to his detriment.

When the Knights come in a reading the question is if you are demonstrating his energy in a balanced way. Are you too quiet and self-effacing, or are you the opposite, foolhardy and rash? Are you too honorable, sticking to a course even if it is wrong for you because you've committed yourself? Are you too practical, or not practical enough?

When balanced, the Knight of Coins can move quickly when he has decided on a course of action. Once he knows he is free of his engagement to Lucy Steele, Edward rushes to propose to Elinor Dashwood, the woman he loves and a woman far better suited to him than Miss Steele ever was. "Love helps him to overcome his usual self-doubt." Ah, this explains something about me, why love can spur me to make changes, to risk, why I can leap for others when I can't for myself. I need a bit more of that fiery Knight of Wands/Candlesticks to stir my pot, to get me going, to move this immovable object.

What Would Jane Do?

"Fables remain current because they contain eternal truths. The tortoise triumphs over the hare because slow and steady does win the race -- in the long run. This is not a time to rush to judgment, but to move patiently and stealthily. Choose both wisely and well the first time, because instinct does not always serve its master." p. 143